6.29.2004
Wow, I'm kinda glad I got shut out of my house, or otherwise I'd get nothing done!!!!
Well, things have settled between Joe and I, FINALLY! Just to let everyone know...
Thats all for now, I guess...
Well, things have settled between Joe and I, FINALLY! Just to let everyone know...
Thats all for now, I guess...
6.24.2004
My week or two has been so FUCKING terrible, because of this shit I am dragged into this fucked-up love square from hell.
So I have decided tomorrow morning (at precisely 9 am) that I am officially ending it with Joe. I don't mean to be a bitch or anything but I am so sick and tired of all this crap...
I understand now why Joe wanted to end it a few weeks ago, but I don't think he knows this. I don't feel as emotionally attached to Joe as I used to.
What I also realized was (and I found this out when I last stayed at Gemma's house) that I don't feel as comfortable and safe as I used to. NOTE: I feel completely and utterly safe when I am at Gemma's house. I don't even feel that safe at home. When Joe came bounding up the stairs, my defenses and walls went straight up. That was when I realized I don't feel for him the same way as I used to, though I don't know why exactly. Not to mention, when he kissed Gemma (basically right in front of me -- but technically right behind my back) I didn't feel one ounce of jealously, hatred, anger, or any of the other emotions I should have felt, NOT ONE.
The thing that made me most upset was that Joe didn't tell me a single thing about what was going on (I knew he was going to sleep with Gemma as sometime or another, I just didn't know when. And I had already given permission, cause I wasn't gonna fuck him anyways, but I expected him to at least tell me when, but he didn't tell me at all. Gemma actually told me.)
And somehow Richard is involved (okay Joe was having "fun" with him that's how he's involved) with this whole mess and is mad at me (why I have no idea), and probably everybody else! (Though I do have to admit, Richard shocked me today when he told me he was sorry for all of this mess, and told me not to be involved *Like I'm not already*)
Because I tend to think with my heart, not my head, and it took me quite awhile to see past my love. But I still don't know what I am going to do about all of this.
Anywho, that is the basis for the reason I am breaking up with Joe.... anyone want to comment-- mail me! farscapechick2001@yahoo.com
But for the real kicker in this week: I am being kicked out of my house (for real this time) on Thursday July 1, 2004. Therefore, I must find a place to live and a job within the next week-- yeah good luck on that!
So I have decided tomorrow morning (at precisely 9 am) that I am officially ending it with Joe. I don't mean to be a bitch or anything but I am so sick and tired of all this crap...
I understand now why Joe wanted to end it a few weeks ago, but I don't think he knows this. I don't feel as emotionally attached to Joe as I used to.
What I also realized was (and I found this out when I last stayed at Gemma's house) that I don't feel as comfortable and safe as I used to. NOTE: I feel completely and utterly safe when I am at Gemma's house. I don't even feel that safe at home. When Joe came bounding up the stairs, my defenses and walls went straight up. That was when I realized I don't feel for him the same way as I used to, though I don't know why exactly. Not to mention, when he kissed Gemma (basically right in front of me -- but technically right behind my back) I didn't feel one ounce of jealously, hatred, anger, or any of the other emotions I should have felt, NOT ONE.
The thing that made me most upset was that Joe didn't tell me a single thing about what was going on (I knew he was going to sleep with Gemma as sometime or another, I just didn't know when. And I had already given permission, cause I wasn't gonna fuck him anyways, but I expected him to at least tell me when, but he didn't tell me at all. Gemma actually told me.)
And somehow Richard is involved (okay Joe was having "fun" with him that's how he's involved) with this whole mess and is mad at me (why I have no idea), and probably everybody else! (Though I do have to admit, Richard shocked me today when he told me he was sorry for all of this mess, and told me not to be involved *Like I'm not already*)
Because I tend to think with my heart, not my head, and it took me quite awhile to see past my love. But I still don't know what I am going to do about all of this.
Anywho, that is the basis for the reason I am breaking up with Joe.... anyone want to comment-- mail me! farscapechick2001@yahoo.com
But for the real kicker in this week: I am being kicked out of my house (for real this time) on Thursday July 1, 2004. Therefore, I must find a place to live and a job within the next week-- yeah good luck on that!
6.05.2004
Wow, this week has been hell, and I am happy its over, cause its Saturday, which means MOVIE NIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't know what to go see yet....
* Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
* Shrek 2
* Troy
* Van Helsing (again :D )
hmm... gonna have to decide soon.
Anyways my week in hell was mainly because of the antics of 3 mischevious and wild children and baby Sage. They are all between the ages of 23 months and 5.
The only reason it was a hell, was for the fact because Luna and Seth CANNOT GET ALONG! (Oh, my god, all the bickering I heard between the two could last me two lifetimes).
The only one who was good was baby Sage.
(Thats why, last night when Bonnie called looking for me, I had my dad cover me and say I wasn't home -- hehe).
I mean I love them all to death, but a couple of days away is going to do me some good.
I don't know what to go see yet....
* Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
* Shrek 2
* Troy
* Van Helsing (again :D )
hmm... gonna have to decide soon.
Anyways my week in hell was mainly because of the antics of 3 mischevious and wild children and baby Sage. They are all between the ages of 23 months and 5.
The only reason it was a hell, was for the fact because Luna and Seth CANNOT GET ALONG! (Oh, my god, all the bickering I heard between the two could last me two lifetimes).
The only one who was good was baby Sage.
(Thats why, last night when Bonnie called looking for me, I had my dad cover me and say I wasn't home -- hehe).
I mean I love them all to death, but a couple of days away is going to do me some good.
